HOUSEHOLD TIPS NOT FOUND IN WOMAN'S WEEKLY

[Tizer]

No worries!
I think that's what they say out there, isn't it? At least that's what it seems from reading Terry Pratchett's book `The Last Continent'. LINK

[Stanley]

I don't mind a bit of fantasy but that's a bit too fantastic for me.
Today's tip, if the course of events in your world puzzles you, think about pendulums..... They swing one way and then another. The bigger the pendulum and the longer its moment, the longer it takes to swing.
(Today's puzzle, how long would the moment of a pendulum have to be to give it a period of 50 years....... That should drive all other thoughts out of your head.)

[Tizer]

Today's tip - from the Old Scholars article in the Schools thread...
The speaker's advice to parents was :— "Never be afraid of spending money on your children's education You are giving them something which, in after years, money can't buy," he declared. "Apart from a knowledge of various subjects, schools teach us the difference between right and wrong, and probably that fact has kept a great many of us out of gaol." (Laughter.) If they carried out the simple rules they learnt at the Church School they would never go far wrong. In the words of Longfellow, success was nothing more and nothing less than doing the daily task that lay before them well, and doing well whatever they had to do. Nothing was gained without hard work, and if any¬one wanted to achieve anything, they must not depend on the schoolmaster, but "put their backs into it."

[Stanley]

My philosophy exactly. John must have posted another piece and I haven't seen it yet. I look forward to it.

[Stanley]

If you wake up to find that your router has died during the night don't panic or lose your temper. Get the old router out that you kept safe when the new one arrived and re-install it. With a bit of luck that will keep you going until you can solve the problem of a replacement.

[Stanley]

Reading MD in my Private Eye this week... He was talking about the bad provision of services for female incontinence, something that seems not to be regarded as the real problem that it is, and reminded me of the best free treatment for it, regular pelvic floor exercises. He couldn't understand why they aren't promoted more as the treatment costs nothing, can be done anywhere at any time and as a side benefit improves orgasm so what's not to like? (I know, we don't talk about matters like this but we should!)
I can't comment on the last benefit but would like to place on record the fact that it is good for men as well. Have a look at THIS NHS advice if you don't know what I am talking about. We readily accept the benefit of other exercises like walking but ignore other obvious areas. It makes just as much sense!

[Stanley]

An old superstition tells us that nails and hair should only be cut on Sunday as this is the only day when witches can't harvest the clippings and use them in a spell against you. Totally incredible of course but I have just clipped my finger nails!

[Stanley]

Another of Mother's gems... "Never pull a face when an East wind is blowing, it might stay that way!"

[Marilyn]

Oh yes...we got that one as kids too!

[Stanley]

Lovely Maz! That's the first time I have found anyone who has heard it, I thought mother might have made it up!
If you have children who come pestering for money as soon as they hear the chimes of an ice cream van, do what a woman I heard about used to do. Tell the kids that the ice cream van only sounded the chimes when they had run out of ice cream...

[Marilyn]

And..."sit up straight or you will get round shoulders".

[Stanley]

And "Get your elbows off the table!". I wonder how many kids eat at a table today. I admit that the only time I do it now is when I am eating out with friends and that isn't very often. (But I still mind me Ps and Qs....)
I intrigued myself with his one so I had a furtle and found this on the origins...
" 1. Mind your pints and quarts. This is suggested as deriving from the practice of chalking up a tally of drinks in English pubs (on the slate). Publicans had to make sure to mark up the quart drinks as distinct from the pint drinks. This explanation is widely repeated but there's little to support it, apart from the fact that pint and quart begin with P and Q.
2. Advice to printers' apprentices to avoid confusing the backward-facing metal type lowercase Ps and Qs, or the same advice to children who were learning to write. I've never heard any suggestion that anyone should 'mind their Ds and Bs' though, even though that makes just as much sense and has the added benefit of rhyming, which would have made it a more attractive slogan. Nevertheless, the fact that handmade paper was an expensive commodity and that the setting of type in early presses was very time consuming makes the printing story a strong candidate. The fact that type had to be set upside down and backwards made the need for a warning to be careful doubly appropriate.
3. Mind your pea (jacket) and queue (wig). Pea jackets were short rough woollen overcoats, commonly worn by sailors in the 18th century. Perruques were full wigs worn by fashionable gentlemen. It is difficult to imagine the need for an expression to warn people to avoid confusing them.
'Pee', as a name for a man's coarse coat, is recorded as early as 1485, so it is possible that that is what Dekker was referring to in his 1602 citation. If so, that usage long pre-dates all others and we have the definitive origin of 'pee and kue'. 'Kue' or 'cue' as the name of a man's wig isn't known until well after 1602 though, so it still isn't certain what Dekker meant by it.
4. Mind your pieds (feet) and queues (wigs). This is suggested to have been an instruction given by French dancing masters to their charges. This has the benefit of placing the perruque in the right context - as long as we accept the phrase as being originally French. However, there's no reason to suppose it is from France and no version of the phrase exists in French.
5. Another version of the 'advice to children' origin has it that 'Ps and Qs' derives from 'mind your pleases and thank-yous''. That is widely touted as an origin but seems to me to be a back-formation, that is, an explanation fitted to explain the phrase after it was coined in some other context. 'Pleases and thank-yous' doesn't appear to lead to 'Ps and Qs'.

So, pay nothing and take your choice. For what it's worth, my virtual two-pennyworth goes to 2b, that is, the advice to children who were learning to write. "

[Big Kev]

I wonder how many kids eat at a table today.

All 3 of mine ate at the dining table, it is still the case at my house.

There is a table in the kitchen for breakfast and one in the dining room for dinner and tea.

[Cathy]

And hopefully no phones allowed to be fiddled with, played with, or answered.
Grrr... ☹

[Marilyn]

Cazza, our kids don't use their phones during meals ( but Gosh!) they are so darn busy on them after eating, that they don't have time to help with the dishes!

Stanley, here is one that I don't expect you have heard in your life, but I certainly have..."Foster kids have big ears" ( yes we did have, because life could change in an instant and we always listened out in case our lives were about to be upended again.)
Adults would also say "these walls have big ears" too. Same thing. ( or "Dumbo is about"...Dumbo being the elephant with big ears).
Sometimes they would spell important words. I was excellent at spelling!

[Marilyn]

How about "pull your socks up!" ( meaning try harder/behave better)

[Tizer]

Here's a different type of household tip...
`Are you going to the toilet wrong?
`If you're sitting on the toilet watching this then stop! Here's why you should try squatting instead...' ' LINK

[Cathy]

How about 'pull your lugoyle'. I only know one person who said that.

Or you're eyes are bigger than your belly, meaning you're being greedy.

And the one that related to me was 'It's the quiet ones you have to watch'. I was always very quiet.

[Stanley]

You're right Maz, I have never heard the foster kids one. Cathy's are good as well, I know some but not all.
Today's tip, find out how the hood works on your new waterproof before going outside on a wet windy day. The hood on my new coat is very light and it took me ten minutes to crack the secret of tightening the elastic cord that cures the problem!

[Marilyn]

When you were little and you were being a sook or pouting, did your Mum ever tell you there was "a fairy sat on your bottom lip"?

[Stanley]

No Maz, that's another new one on me.
How about "It's not too big. You'll grow into it."



1943 on holiday at Cleveleys.

[Cathy]

No Marilyn I don't remember that one.
I do remember 'Mr Nobody ' being referred to every now and then.

[Stanley]

We had a Mr Nobody. Remember 'Leo's for meddlers'?

[Cathy]

Leo's for meddlers, what's that all about?

[Marilyn]

I remember Mr Nobody. ( he was trouble and often about...and I could sometimes know about the things he did (spooky) but not always. I recall Uncle Harold's watch disappearing..and somehow...mysteriously......hey presto...it was found MY bed. (How on earth....?)
But don't recall Leo's for medlars. (Oh dear...I am a Leo)