Old fashioned clean jokes

[Tripps]

Being "Burns Night" - it's time to return to these old friends.

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[Stanley]

Ah..... "Wee sleekit ccooering timerous beastie...."

[Tizer]

Not a joke but a genuine Asda product recall from The Times newspaper some years ago. It's still difficult to believe it was genuine! [Since first posting this newspaper cutting I've read the reverse side of the page and see Ehud Olmert had just become Prime Minister of Israel, which means the Asda notice would date to around May 2006. Older than I thought!]

[Stanley]

Peter, thanks for that. There are some things that strike me so often when I see 'experts' demonstrating their craft. Vises that aren't fastened securely to a solid bench and hammer and axe heads that aren't properly installed. (If done properly they will never come lose.)

[Tizer]

I've just added this note to the Asda post...
Since first posting this newspaper cutting I've read the reverse side of the page and see Ehud Olmert had just become Prime Minister of Israel, which means the Asda notice would date to around May 2006. Older than I thought!

[Stanley]

[Stanley]

[Stanley]

[Cathy]

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[Big Kev]

[Big Kev]

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[Stanley]

One way of looking at it

[Big Kev]

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[Stanley]

[Tripps]

Perhaps not in the best of taste - but Bernard Manning would have been proud of it.

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[Big Kev]

it tickled my sense of humour

[Stanley]

Mine too!

[Cathy]

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(I still have some from the 70’s…)

[Stanley]

I never went to a party......

[Tizer]

There must have been some funny and/or embarrassing moments as those Tupperware parties morphed into sex toy parties!

Now, a dad joke. What did Sherlock Holmes say when Watson asked him how he knew the death of a victim was due to swallowing poison?

► Show Spoiler

It's alimentary, my dear Watson.

[Stanley]

Oh dear!

[Big Kev]

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[Cathy]

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[Stanley]

[Stanley]